The Apartment Chap 4

Hell is looking for an apartment in New York City.  I have seen every apartment in this stupid city that isn't completely overrun by cockroaches.  And every time I go see an apartment with Eve they think that we're a couple and cannot stop telling us how "This is such a great neighborhood for kids." At least looking at all of these stupid apartments has stopped me from face book stalking Roger and his stupid hoe bag assistant Becky.  Roger has left me about 4 messages, so needless to say I am pissed.  We were married, this was not just some summer fling, we were supposed o spend the rest of our lives together.  Forgive me for thinking that the rest of our lives is worth a little bit more than four 1 minute long messages.  I want him to cry over me, I want him to beg me to come back.  Of course I would never go back to him, I have some dignity okay, relax.  I wonder if he even thinks that any of this was a mistake, because it was, he really effed this up.  I am a pretty modern girl, but I think that marriage is supposed o mean something.  first of all it is a legally binding agreement that two people want to be together, second of all Roger said all of these things, he would bring me flowers when he picked me up from work, was all of that a lie, I mean it isn't, it can't be, how can it be?

So that sad stuff aside, i found an apartment, one that isn't completely covered in Satan's juice (Rogerish fluids).  Its really cute, its a one bedroom with an awesome kitchen, it's not as nice as my old one, but without Roger's income I can't afford anything with that much glam.  So a one bedroom loft in SoHo will have to do, for now.  The Apartment is actually very nice, the kitchen is so nice I might actually even think about cooking for like, 30 seconds.  It's a great apartment for entertaining and it's pretty close to my office.  Oh, i forgot to tell you, i am going back to work tomorrow. You know I just realized that that jerk faced idiot mongering jack face jerk off Roger should not get to dictate how my career goes for the next ten years.  I also realized that when i took time off of work to get over that idiot mongering jerk, i was letting him in all of his jerkiness dictate my career, something I worked very hard for, and I am not just going to let him get away with stealing that from me.

Work should be interesting anyways, all the women will feel so terrible for me and then ask for Roger's number, you know as long as I am okay with that.  But what am i supposed to say, 'Oh you know I'm really not okay with you asking out my totally available ex husband, yeah that's right, the rich attractive one, Yeah you got it.  So even though he is completely off limits for me, I am just going to be selfish and conceited and keep him away from everyone else, because I'm a possessive psycho.' Then after that emotional hell storm, all of the guys, including my boss, what am I saying, especially my boss will hit on me.  But like the slightly patronizing, oh you're a recent divorce kind off hitting on.   You know right now i'm at the stage where I spite date all of Roger's friends especially the one who Roger was always slightly jealous of, Jake.  So that's something to look forward to.